Thursday, March 01, 2007

Quick Eyes

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I have an affliction that causes much turmoil for me. My reflexes are so fast, that the exact moment I sense a flash, my eyes slam shut. This causes approximately 84.7% of flash photos taken of me to have my eyes closed making me look stoned. Funny once, but after awhile it gets mighty annoying. During a recent visit with family in Denver we named this affliction 'quick eyes'. Red eye flashes only make it worse.

Sometimes only the left eye gets shut...

This makes it look like I got punched. Sweet.

Some claim that I am purposely ruining pictures. This pisses me off to no end. I have no control over this! There are only two options to guarantee a shot with my eyes open. Strain to keep my eyes open which makes me look bug eyed or have a photo taken in strong light where no flash is needed.

Why do I bring this up? I game across a couple interesting posts on my favorite gadget site Gizmodo. The first was this one chronicling a camera that someone rigged that takes a picture of you every time you blink. Seems like a lot of work to get pictures of your eyes closed mid-blink. 'Specially when I can get them for free. Then I thought about it, what if this technology was used for good. If you can wire a camera to know when your eyes are closed, it should be just as easy to know when your eyes are open. That is what I need.

Then today I came across this... Canon Blink Shot Cameras Won't Shoot Till Everyone's Eyes Are Open Sounds great, but I doubt it will solve my problem. This will fix the problem of someone randomly blinking when you release the shutter, but my problem is different. My eyes aren't closed until the instant that the shutter is released. I must be clairvoyant, able to see the future, knowing that the camera will flash, before it flashes.

It would be nice if I could use this power for good, perhaps predicting sports scores or the stock market.

Oh well, If you have a flash photograph of me with my eyes open, consider yourself lucky. It doesn't happen very often.


Anonymous,  3/01/2007 7:47 PM  

Do you still blink your eyes even when there is no flash?? lol ;) People just need to snap and not even warn you.

Mike D. 3/01/2007 8:03 PM  

No flash = eyes open.

The problem is, the millisecond the flash is fired, my eyes slam shut, hence the 'quick eyes'. warning or no warning, it doesn't matter.

Maybe someday this will save my eyesight from the flash from a thermonuclear explosion, but for now it just ruins pictures.

Mary 3/04/2007 2:28 PM  

Maybe photo editors should have 'shut eye' options like they have red eye eye options - they may not be your eyes, but at least your eye's aren't shut in the picture.

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